It’s Monday; Let’s Shit on Bill Cosby

Hey! Hey! Hey! Bet you don't have a punchline under that cap.
Hey! Hey! Hey! Bet you don’t have a punch line under that cap.

Like every good little Negro who grew up in the 80s and 90s I have seen my fair share of the Cosby Show. In fact, I’ve watched Fat Albert. I’ve listened to hours of comedy tapes. After all that, I can count on two hands the number of times I remember LOLing at the Coz. I just don’t really find him funny. Yet, I’ve felt a need to pretend that I think he’s great – almost as if there were a certain number of Black Points at stake. I freely admit that taste is relative; if you love the Jell-O man, I mean you no disrespect. I just can’t live the lie anymore. I have laughed harder at Dane Cook than I ever have at Bill Cosby. (Breathe that in if you dare…)

And while we’re at it, I have a couple other confessions.

Does anyone else think there would've been an ET2 if Michael hadn't tried to get the alien to Neverland?
Does anyone else think there would’ve been an ET2 if Michael hadn’t tried to get the alien to Neverland?
  • I think Michael Jackson is overrated. I’m not talking about fame — or infamy, whichever you prefer. In considering his body of work, I have a hard time ranking him as highly as the universe seems to put him. I’m happy to discuss the issue, but it’ll take more than the inevitable “He made Thriller” to persuade me.
Orbit the Isotope mascot doing his thang. Be jealous.
Orbit the Isotope mascot doing his thang. Be jealous.
  • Baseball is my favorite sport, not basketball. I’m happy to wake up in the morning and turn on Hot Stove on the MLB Network. Sometimes I forget to check what went on in the NBA altogether. I secretly wish my mom gave me a glove, not a basketball, as a kid. But, alas…. I don’t think it should cost me hood points because I know as much about the Albuquerque Isotopes as I do the Miami Heat right now.
Seriously, faces like this is why there will always be a KKK.
Seriously, faces like this is why there will always be a KKK.
  • I learn most of my slang from white children. In fact, if I didn’t have to chauffeur some of my boys to and from basketball practice, I would have no idea who Trinidad James is, among many others. At the risk of sounding two thousand and late,  I’ve finally reached a point where I find a lot of the stuff that is #trending kind of #dumb.

What’s the point? Life is easier when you spend your energy being true to who you are even if that flies in the face of convention.  I’m sure if we take the time to scratch a little deeper under the surface of the people we know, we’ll realize that none of us actually fit neatly in the boxes we pretend to inhabit. My blackness is actually not related to my interests. It’s not something I should feel the need to prove or validate. Likewise, the labels that make up your identity are true just because you wear them. No one can take your you from you.

As Bill Cosby once said, “I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.” How right you are, sir. You have never pleased me. And I wish you all the continued success on the world.

6 thoughts on “It’s Monday; Let’s Shit on Bill Cosby”

  1. Word up on MJ. I change the station every time he comes on the radio (How many times can one really here “Man in the Mirror” and “The Way You Make Me Feel”?).

    And yet, I enjoy listening to him in album form (a sad ritual that has been jettisoned for the sake of hit singles). Thriller (yes) is a masterpiece – as a whole. But “Beat It” and “Thriller” by themselves, ugh.

    1. In my old age I find myself more willing to listen to MJ if he comes on the radio. It’s like, “I remember when he was alive.” “I remember when he was black.” “I remember when he was a man.” Sigh. Click.

  2. I’m a white dude (as white guys are wont to call themselves) and consider myself a comedy know it all, and although I can agree with you, I have to say the FIRST comedy album (yeah, I said album) I listened to was ‘Bill Cosby Himself’ (I think that was the one) in which I laughed my little fat white ass off as Bill talked about owning a pet rhino. Of course, after I heard Eddie Murphy’s 1st album I was like “Bill Cosby who?”, but still, it was ok to the mind of a 10 year old. As an adult, my beef with the Coz doesn’t come from his comedy, but from the fact that he bought the rights to “The Little Rascals” and refuses to release ANY of them because Buckwheat is an offensive and racist character. How the FUCK is Buckwheat an offensive and racist character? Who’s more included than Buck? Buck was integral to the functionality of The Little Rascals as a gang and I put it to you that fucking Fat Albert is more offensive to, not only black people, but heavy set people, people with speech impedaments, and thin crack dealers who wear horrible sweaters. And for those reasons I give a resounding FUCK YOU to Bill and I wish him luck in all of his future horrific bouts of cancer! Nothing worse than a comedian who edits comedy.

    1. Thanks for your comments (and your “fuck you” to the Coz)! I completely agree about the editing of comedy; it is one thing to control your own creations but an entirely different one to poo poo what you didn’t make.

      I’ll continue to not change the radio dial immediately when one of BC’s routines come on, but I don’t anticipate any of it making me laugh. To each his own!

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