Miss Utah misses: dealing with dumbness

By now most of you have seen Miss Utah embarass herself and everyone who’s ever known her with this incredibly witty response during the question round of the recent Miss USA pageant.  If you haven’t, here’s what you missed:

It is doubly ironic that the question Little Miss Stereotype failed to answer in any logical way related to the ongoing struggle for female equality in America.  We could certainly go on for a long time about injustice in this country; no one can deny with a straight face that men generally have it better than women in terms of being valued for who they are versus how they pee.

(I’m obviously speaking in general terms to make a larger point. I once saw a lady pee standing up at a urinal in a shitty gay bar perched above the sheriff’s office, so clearly women can do anything they set their minds to doing).

Having never said anything stupid *cough* I really wonder what our genius from Salt Lake is going through right now.  Is she in hiding?  Are people speaking more slowly to her?  Has she been able to check Facebook or Twitter yet? (By the way, if you don’t already you should totally follow me! Just click that link on the left of your screen).  What is life like after everyone thinks that you’re more missing link than MENSA?

Girl should’ve started with these jazz hands.

Real talk, kids: we’ve all open our mouths wide enough to eat our feet.  We’ve all been put on the spot and had to bs our way through a situation that should’ve gone better.  The real impact is in how we recover from such a setback.  Hopefully Miss Utah will look at her tape and say, “Damn, I was a dumb something-or-other that night but at least my dress was bomb.”

As for the rest of us, let’s all take the requisite amount of time to laugh at this girl until it masks enough of our own inner pain and then get back to focusing on all the ways that we need to do better ourselves.  And if someone asks you something that you don’t know how to answer today, promise to fight for world peace and have a convenient wardrobe malfunction.  The rest will take care of itself.

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